I have always wanted to start a collection of Mexican idioms, which all Mexicans,born there or here have grown up hearing. We have an idiom or saying for everything, and I would like to make them known along with their meanings or psychological significance. I will start with my favorite one "Mas sabe el diablo por viejo,que por diablo," The devil is more the wisest because he is old, rather than because he is the devil.
I think the meaning of this one is well understood, and the older I get~no pun intended~the more it becomes true. Experience, more than any schooling or education,makes us wiser. The older we get, or the more we experience, the more we know, the more intuitive,if you may, we become. We can read people better,we can for see the outcome of situations, etc... I remember as a teen always thinking my mom was some kind of witch, or fortune teller, because everything she would warn me about would come true. I was at constant war with my mother, but now I understand her, I have become like her, because of experience.How I wish I would have listened, just the same way I now wish my kids would listen. But my kids see me now as I saw my mother then, as a nag. So we need to accept as parents, that our children need to live their own life, experience things, fall, just as they did off those bikes. make their own mistakes, so that one day they can and will, become all the wiser. We can try in the friendliest, lovingly way possible to give our best advice, but it is up to them to learn through experience,just as we have.
Monday, September 8, 2014
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Mas vale malo conocido, que bueno por conocer.
The exact translation: A bad one already known, is worth more than a good one yet to know. The meaning: You're better off staying with the one you already know and are used to, than getting involved with one who seems to be better, yet you really don't know!
And yes, again, my relationships with men made me think of this one as well. As bad as my relationships have been...at least they have helped to wake up my creative side. And I hear your disagreements already...LOUD and CLEAR!!! Whoa... hold on, let me explain. You are saying "What???" If I have a bad relationship/person in my life of course he's out the door to let a better one in. And I'm not going to pass up a good opportunity/relationship just to stick to someone not good for me,what are you crazy??? So here goes my point of view:
First of all,yes...we shouldn't hold on to a bad relationship and /or person in our life,and of course we need to be on the look out for something better for us! I agree 100%! But.... here's what made me think of this saying:
My actual relationship is not the greatest, and I know it's not going anywhere. But I've known this person for years...I know what to expect and not expect. Actually, expectations is part of the problem, so I've decided to hang those up in the closet...for now,or at least, with this person!
It is far and few between that we get to enjoy each others company and do something, let's say, special. But when we do, it is very enjoyable,relaxing and it makes me look at this person and remember why we became friends in the first place. This weekend we had planned one of those special get together's, which was simply getting up early to go out into nature and do some fishing. We take a picnic, enjoy nature, talk, get reacquainted. It makes me feel re energized, unstressed. Well, I canceled this date because someone I believed to be a better option wanted to do something this weekend. This man seemed to have everything I'm looking for and free from the obstacles that get in the way of my actual relationship. He has a higher level of education for one, closer to my age,etc... We had planned to hook up a couple times before,but it never materialized. (Red flag # 1 by the way). Finally this weekend, we made solid plans...at his request. I had a very busy weekend, so I ended up putting all my to do's on hold. I cancelled my fishing trip with my actual "half", and put all my energy into this new date with this new person. To make a long story short...he stood me up! And it wasn't just standing me up. I wasted money, drove out far from where I live, my car almost broke down, it was very aggravating. And I missed out on my fishing date which only comes around once every 4 to 6 months. And which I truly enjoy to relax and de-stress.
Needless to say, this new person is not getting another chance. But yes, I am keeping the door open to something better,but not until I know, am sure, that it IS better,then, I let him in the door. Those are the key words: Por conocer...yet to know! So don't give up what you have just yet,unless of course it is really bad, to the point of abuse or damage to your self, then please do let go whether there is another prospect or not. If you are not sure of the goodness of something/someone, don't risk losing all you have invested, just to dive in to something without really knowing it. Be sure it's good first,know it well first,make them prove themselves, be sure. And really, I think this applies more to those who seek the greener grass on the other side, already having green enough grass in their own backyard. People who end a marriage and break up a family just because they met someone else whom they think they will enjoy eternal bliss with. No you wont! Eternal bliss does not come from another person, it comes from within yourself. And when you find it within yourself, then you can make that marriage work out and not look elsewhere. This I can relate to also. I married very young, had children, and the routine bored me. My husband and I got along great, I just let everyday life get the best of me, and I thought I fell out of love. So I had an affair. My husband left me, and eventually,so did my lover.I ended up with nobody,well deserved! My children grew up without a father and I have remained single so to speak until this day. Why? I thought that with my lover I would find happiness, fall in love again, have eternal bliss. Didn't happen. I hurt my husband so much he couldn't deal being around me and the kids. And I know we had what it takes to have worked it out...but I was looking for something better.
The moral of this story: Let's count our blessings. Let's really look at what we have, enjoy it,work on it,nourish it and be thankful for it, before we go looking for something we think will be better, but may end up being worse!
And yes, again, my relationships with men made me think of this one as well. As bad as my relationships have been...at least they have helped to wake up my creative side. And I hear your disagreements already...LOUD and CLEAR!!! Whoa... hold on, let me explain. You are saying "What???" If I have a bad relationship/person in my life of course he's out the door to let a better one in. And I'm not going to pass up a good opportunity/relationship just to stick to someone not good for me,what are you crazy??? So here goes my point of view:
First of all,yes...we shouldn't hold on to a bad relationship and /or person in our life,and of course we need to be on the look out for something better for us! I agree 100%! But.... here's what made me think of this saying:
My actual relationship is not the greatest, and I know it's not going anywhere. But I've known this person for years...I know what to expect and not expect. Actually, expectations is part of the problem, so I've decided to hang those up in the closet...for now,or at least, with this person!
It is far and few between that we get to enjoy each others company and do something, let's say, special. But when we do, it is very enjoyable,relaxing and it makes me look at this person and remember why we became friends in the first place. This weekend we had planned one of those special get together's, which was simply getting up early to go out into nature and do some fishing. We take a picnic, enjoy nature, talk, get reacquainted. It makes me feel re energized, unstressed. Well, I canceled this date because someone I believed to be a better option wanted to do something this weekend. This man seemed to have everything I'm looking for and free from the obstacles that get in the way of my actual relationship. He has a higher level of education for one, closer to my age,etc... We had planned to hook up a couple times before,but it never materialized. (Red flag # 1 by the way). Finally this weekend, we made solid plans...at his request. I had a very busy weekend, so I ended up putting all my to do's on hold. I cancelled my fishing trip with my actual "half", and put all my energy into this new date with this new person. To make a long story short...he stood me up! And it wasn't just standing me up. I wasted money, drove out far from where I live, my car almost broke down, it was very aggravating. And I missed out on my fishing date which only comes around once every 4 to 6 months. And which I truly enjoy to relax and de-stress.
Needless to say, this new person is not getting another chance. But yes, I am keeping the door open to something better,but not until I know, am sure, that it IS better,then, I let him in the door. Those are the key words: Por conocer...yet to know! So don't give up what you have just yet,unless of course it is really bad, to the point of abuse or damage to your self, then please do let go whether there is another prospect or not. If you are not sure of the goodness of something/someone, don't risk losing all you have invested, just to dive in to something without really knowing it. Be sure it's good first,know it well first,make them prove themselves, be sure. And really, I think this applies more to those who seek the greener grass on the other side, already having green enough grass in their own backyard. People who end a marriage and break up a family just because they met someone else whom they think they will enjoy eternal bliss with. No you wont! Eternal bliss does not come from another person, it comes from within yourself. And when you find it within yourself, then you can make that marriage work out and not look elsewhere. This I can relate to also. I married very young, had children, and the routine bored me. My husband and I got along great, I just let everyday life get the best of me, and I thought I fell out of love. So I had an affair. My husband left me, and eventually,so did my lover.I ended up with nobody,well deserved! My children grew up without a father and I have remained single so to speak until this day. Why? I thought that with my lover I would find happiness, fall in love again, have eternal bliss. Didn't happen. I hurt my husband so much he couldn't deal being around me and the kids. And I know we had what it takes to have worked it out...but I was looking for something better.
The moral of this story: Let's count our blessings. Let's really look at what we have, enjoy it,work on it,nourish it and be thankful for it, before we go looking for something we think will be better, but may end up being worse!
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Arbol que crece torcido, jamas sus ramas endereza.
The tree which crooked has grown, will never straighten its branches. This one, also said to me by the "diablo" of my mother, was first said in reference to some of my 'friends', then later in life to the men I dated. How much sense it makes now! I want to believe we were all raised with morals, taught right and wrong, and molded into a perfect straight tree. But this is not so. I'm sure all mothers and/or fathers did the best they could, but then there's life, circumstances, situations that turn out to be like a wall which blocks the sun that shines on a seedling, giving it light and energy and allowing it to grow straight and strong. If the sun is blocked, then the tree barely grows, it grows crooked, weak. The sun is love, kindness, good will, and those who grow up without that, then of course wold not know how to give it.
As an example of this I would like to use the men I date that my mother referred to. As many women, I tend to follow a pattern,fall for the same type of guy. The nurturing that all women are instinctively born with tends to make us more susceptible to these bad boys we think need our love and guidance to change. But they never change, do they? Why? Because we are following a pattern, we are always falling for the men that we feel need our love, because somewhere on the road of their lives they lacked it. So they grew up not knowing how to love, how to accept love,how to receive and give kindness. As women we need to change our views and change our patterns. It's like we our shopping in the clearance aisle and we see a dress that is very cheap and we think,'with a few alterations here and there, it will fit!' Well, we deserve better...we need a nice dress that fits perfectly from the beginning even if we pay a little more! Maybe we can buy something on clearance and alter it, but hey...this only works with clothes,not men! With men, we need to step away from the clearance rack, and go to where the most expensive outfits in the store are, the one's that will compliment us perfectly, don't need changing and that we deserve! Because remember...a tree which crooked grows, will never straighten its branches no matter how much sun (love) and water (nurturing) we give it! It's too late...it's grown!
As an example of this I would like to use the men I date that my mother referred to. As many women, I tend to follow a pattern,fall for the same type of guy. The nurturing that all women are instinctively born with tends to make us more susceptible to these bad boys we think need our love and guidance to change. But they never change, do they? Why? Because we are following a pattern, we are always falling for the men that we feel need our love, because somewhere on the road of their lives they lacked it. So they grew up not knowing how to love, how to accept love,how to receive and give kindness. As women we need to change our views and change our patterns. It's like we our shopping in the clearance aisle and we see a dress that is very cheap and we think,'with a few alterations here and there, it will fit!' Well, we deserve better...we need a nice dress that fits perfectly from the beginning even if we pay a little more! Maybe we can buy something on clearance and alter it, but hey...this only works with clothes,not men! With men, we need to step away from the clearance rack, and go to where the most expensive outfits in the store are, the one's that will compliment us perfectly, don't need changing and that we deserve! Because remember...a tree which crooked grows, will never straighten its branches no matter how much sun (love) and water (nurturing) we give it! It's too late...it's grown!
Mas sabe el diablo por viejo,que por diablo.
I have always wanted to start a collection of Mexican idioms, which all Mexicans,born there or here have grown up hearing. We have an idiom or saying for everything, and I would like to make them known along with their meanings or psychological significance. I will start with my favorite one "Mas sabe el diablo por viejo,que por diablo," The devil is more the wisest because he is old, rather than because he is the devil.
I think the meaning of this one is well understood, and the older I get~no pun intended~the more it becomes true. Experience, more than any schooling or education,makes us wiser. The older we get, or the more we experience, the more we know, the more intuitive,if you may, we become. We can read people better,we can for see the outcome of situations, etc... I remember as a teen always thinking my mom was some kind of witch, or fortune teller, because everything she would warn me about would come true. I was at constant war with my mother, but now I understand her, I have become like her, because of experience.How I wish I would have listened, just the same way I now wish my kids would listen. But my kids see me now as I saw my mother then, as a nag. So we need to accept as parents, that our children need to live their own life, experience things, fall, (just as they did off those bikes), make their own mistakes, so that one day they can and will, become all the wiser. We can try in the friendliest, lovingly way possible to give our best advice, but it is up to them to learn through experience, just as we have.
I think the meaning of this one is well understood, and the older I get~no pun intended~the more it becomes true. Experience, more than any schooling or education,makes us wiser. The older we get, or the more we experience, the more we know, the more intuitive,if you may, we become. We can read people better,we can for see the outcome of situations, etc... I remember as a teen always thinking my mom was some kind of witch, or fortune teller, because everything she would warn me about would come true. I was at constant war with my mother, but now I understand her, I have become like her, because of experience.How I wish I would have listened, just the same way I now wish my kids would listen. But my kids see me now as I saw my mother then, as a nag. So we need to accept as parents, that our children need to live their own life, experience things, fall, (just as they did off those bikes), make their own mistakes, so that one day they can and will, become all the wiser. We can try in the friendliest, lovingly way possible to give our best advice, but it is up to them to learn through experience, just as we have.
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