Arbol que crece torcido, jamas sus ramas endereza.

The tree which crooked has grown, will never straighten its branches. This one, also said to me by the "diablo" of my mother, was first said in reference to some of my 'friends', then later in life to the men I dated. How much sense it makes now! I want to believe we were all raised with morals, taught right and wrong, and molded into a perfect straight tree. But this is not so. I'm sure all mothers and/or fathers did the best they could, but then there's life, circumstances, situations that turn out to be like a wall which blocks the sun that shines on a seedling, giving it light and energy and allowing it to grow straight and strong. If the sun is blocked, then the tree barely grows, it grows crooked, weak. The sun is love, kindness, good will, and those who grow up without that, then of course wold not know how to give it.
 As an example of this I would like to use the men I date that my mother referred to. As many women, I tend to follow a pattern,fall for the same type of guy. The nurturing that all women are instinctively born with tends to make us more susceptible to these bad boys we think need our love and guidance to change. But they never change, do they? Why? Because we are following a pattern, we are always falling for the men that we feel need our love, because somewhere on the road of their lives they lacked it. So they grew up not knowing how to love, how to accept love,how to receive and give kindness. As women we need to change our views and change our patterns. It's like we our shopping in the clearance aisle and we see a dress that is very cheap and we think,'with a few alterations here and there, it will fit!' Well, we deserve better...we need a nice dress that fits perfectly from the beginning even if we pay a little more! Maybe we can buy something on clearance and alter it, but hey...this only works with clothes,not men! With men, we need to step away from the clearance rack, and go to where the most expensive outfits in the store are, the one's that will compliment us perfectly, don't need changing and that we deserve! Because remember...a tree which crooked grows, will never straighten its branches no matter how much sun (love) and water (nurturing) we give it! It's too late...it's grown!